It’s still me, Plex, out and living life with extreme stress. Added to the already heavy stresses mentioned before, there are several medical issues pressing and causing me pain and loss of sleep. I have a ruptured eardrum that I am being treated for but continues to be painful.

Several weeks ago I had a procedure done to my heel that was supposed to deal with the extensive scar tissue that had built up from a tendon that was too short and was tearing when I walked on it. The doctor who did the procedure said it could be up to a year before I was free of pain from it but I had understood him to say that it should improve after a few weeks following the procedure. That didn’t happen for me. Instead, I continue to have excruciating pain from the tendon continuing to be torn and now there is an additional pain that at times is even worse than the pain from the tendon. I’m waiting to hear from the doctor who did the procedure to know what can/should be done about it if anything. Meanwhile I continue to really suffer from the pain in my heel.

I broke a tooth a few days ago and the immediate result was serious pain. It happened while I was on my way to spend the night at Dad’s, and the next day my plans to prioritize getting my tooth looked at and treated were circumvented by two appointments that Dad had – one with his nurse who comes to his home and the second with a social worker. These two appointments took the whole morning to deal with. The nurse pointed out that his blood pressure is dangerously low again and that he needed to be taken to the emergency room to get IV fluids, and she also raised the issue of whether or not it was time to get hospice involved with Dad’s care. Dad and I were both really unprepared to deal with that issue just yet, and his reaction to it triggered an added amount of anger and stress in me.

By the time I got home I decided it was too late to try to get in to see the dentist so I waited until the next morning to call him. When I did I was told there were no appointments available that day so I made one for the next morning. All the delays meant there was nothing to do but suffer the additional pain being caused by the tooth. When I finally did see the dentist, he put a temporary filling in the broken area but said there was also a bad cavity that needed to be filled so I needed to make another appointment in a week to have a permanent filling put in and repair the damaged tooth. He also informed me that the x-rays showed the tooth beside the broken one needed immediate attention by the specialist who does root canals, but I had to wait another day to get in to see him. That brings me to today. The root was severely inflamed and the dr. did a root canal this morning. At least now I have extra pain medication to give some relief from the pain, but it only takes the edge off.

All this additional pain has caused me to become very sleep deprived which has effectively turned up the pressure in the pressure cooker I already felt like I was in; and it’s really hard to function let alone do all the tasks that are demanding my attention. I feel even more overwhelmed than before and I’m torn between wanting to flee from it all and wanting to curl up in a ball and let the world spin.

The point of stating all this isn’t to complain, though. It’s to paint the background picture of the blessing I received today. The appointment this morning (followed by a trip to the pharmacy and a stop at a craft store) meant I spent a good amount of time in the car today. When I’m in the car I often listen to Christian radio, and the timing of my car rides made it possible for me to listen to two of my favorite broadcasts.

Both of them dealt with the issues of being over stressed and feeling desperate. It was exactly what I needed to hear and at the perfect time. It made me think again about the passage of Scripture in Matthew where Jesus points out that the burdens of the world are heavy but His burdens are light, and that the God Who cares for the sparrow cares ever so much about me and my stresses. It felt like a gentle but rich, deep hug from heaven. I felt comforted and loved despite the pain I was in.

I’m so very blessed to be a child of the King. He continues to be the One in control of my world even when it seems to be spinning out of control.