Let me be clear about brother’s response to his acts of violation and violence against us. At time of violation he threatened us to keep us silent. Later, when he was confronted by us as adults, he quickly and willingly admitted complete guilt and did not in any way dismiss or justify his actions. He called them sins and said he was very sorry, that he did not deserve forgiveness but he asked us for it anyway. He explain that he has recently become true believer in Christ Jesus – that he believed that he had been washed clean of the guilt that Christ died on the cross to pay for and redeem him from, but that he also needed my forgiveness. At that time we said we did forgive him;  but gradually we realize that we would continue to need to forgive him at deeper and deeper levels. This he did not understand, but he did not argue the point. He took our forgiveness and so far as we know he never again permitted himself to own any responsibility or guilt and did not see any need to revisit the topic again. There was no public acknowledgment, no confession to father/parents or siblings (that we know of), no involvement or encouragement in healing process we must go through. In fact, he would express confusion and grief about why we would not simply follow his example and be free of the whole issue instead of all the years of therapy and medications and treatment.